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Sky
Live like there's no tomorrow
and
Love like there's no other
but
when will I finally find my Love

HER
19/2009
0310``
.MTS
.MTS-CO
.SKSS
.SKYBAND
.RP
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.MusicStory

我要一个我爱的人，而且他也爱我。。。



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Tuesday, May 06, 2008
depress

i cried...
all the way from i sat down in e bus..
till i got alight..
i continued whn i got home after start replying a fren's abt how i felt.

好痛苦
i felt so lost..
i dunu any direction..

WHY!!
why do i play e piano for??
i play now is for e sake of taking the exam in sept.
whereby my teacher see tat i would fail...
she see it coming...

i wanna feel it!
i wanna feel e beauty of piano..
i wanna feel e beauty of music...

how shld i continue?
i cant play it well, cant get e feel..

i msn-ed wid my fren, e same one, as well as cpt yusri..
i feel these 2 ppl could help me...

my fren said "once you take music seriously, you 4get all e simple pleasure you once had"
i wanna tke it seriously..
i respect it..
respect my love for it.
but somehow i 4got wad is e pleasure i got from playing piano..

i said i dunu wad is gd music perhaps.
i dunu how 2 diff gd tone n bad tone on piano.
my touch is wrong
my feel is wrong
wrong wrong and wrong...

i asked will listening to bad music "de-prove" yourself,
i was answered " you hav 2 learn to live in this environment where not every1 is as gd"

also, mayb i hav 2 get e idea 2 myself tt nt everywhere i can b as gd..
i jus hav 2 try 2 be gd or better.
no need 2 force myself.

i seriously don wanna fail this exam..
i hav nvr failed ABRSM exam b4.

[calm down]

my natural tap from my eyes hav nvr stop since i start e msg 2 my fren till now..
it lasted for an hr plus...
i guess i ran out of tears..
really tired..

this kinda feeling of lost...
no1 can understand...

i guess i'll jus try my best..


nitez loves..
11:25 PM